What makes something persuasive

By doing your homework, presenting pertinent facts, and coming across as an expert in the field, people will be much more receptive to your message.

Be a good listener. Being a good listener means giving people your full attention. Look them in the eye and repeat their name throughout the conversation. Give them a chance to finish before interjecting. Find common ground. Good persuaders seek common ground to establish rapport at the very beginning.

This could be discussing similar areas of expertise, past experiences, or even hobbies outside of work. Establishing common ground will also make you more memorable to that person in the future. Address concerns. If I run it by you, could you think about it for a day or two and then tell me what you think? He loved that approach. One, I showed I valued his wisdom and experience. Two, I showed I didn't just want him to agree -- I genuinely wanted his opinion.

And most importantly, I gave him time to process my idea in the way he felt most comfortable with. Always know your audience.

Don't push for instant agreement if someone's personality style makes that unlikely. But don't ask for thought and reflection if your audience loves to make quick decisions and move on. According to University of Illinois professor Daniel O'Keefe, sharing an opposing viewpoint or two is more persuasive than sticking solely to your argument. Very few ideas are perfect. Your audience knows that. They know there are other perspectives and potential outcomes. So meet them head on.

Talk about the things they're already considering. Discuss potential negatives and show how you will mitigate or overcome those problems. The people in your audience are more likely to be persuaded when they know you understand they could have misgivings. So talk about the other side of the argument -- and then do your best to show why you're still right.

While it's tempting to use scare tactics, positive outcome statements tend to be more persuasive. The researchers hypothesize that most people respond negatively to feeling bullied or guilted into changing a behavior.

So if you're trying to produce change, focus on the positives of that change. Take your audience to a better place Often that is simply to give you what you want whenever possible. In my old lending days, we would often deal with busy underwriters who asked for items we knew they already had.

Instead of arguing the point, we would just resend the documents and save our energy for issues that were not so easily resolved. Give ground where you can and hold your ground only where it matters. Choose being successful over being right. Successful persuaders get that you don't win the battle by constantly berating people with an unending verbal barrage.

Wearing people down is not an effective strategy. They carefully support their arguments and check in with questions that will help to close the conversation. Then they step back. The great sales trainer Tom Hopkins still today teaches these decades-old techniques of his mentor J.

Douglas Edwards. His most important lesson is "Whenever you ask a closing question, shut up. The first person who speaks, loses. Urgency and immediacy are often the enemies of real persuasion. It's possible to close a less significant sale through urgency, but deep ideas require time and thought to take root.

Great persuaders bring you along in your own time. Doing so can be tricky, but under the right circumstances, it can be a perfect fit. For example, let's say you're trying to convince a friend to help you move.

Obviously, there's a lot of work involved with moving, and your friend may not be so willing to go along with it. Instead of talking about all the furniture you need to move, talk about how much fun it will be to go through your old junk, or about how you're buying pizza for everyone afterward, or how you're giving some old things away in the process. Certain words have an inherently higher value than others , and some words have more positive associations than others. For example, "lucrative" is a more powerful word than "good," and "reasonable" is a more powerful word than "alright.

Your goal here isn't to inject big words into your sentences, but rather to arrange your sentences to ensure your meaning comes across precisely.

In the process, you'll come across as a better communicator, which will make you seem more intelligent and thoughtful, and therefore more trustworthy. It's one of the cheaper tricks on this list, so be aware that a good percentage of the population will catch onto you quickly if you're too blunt or obvious. Instead of outright bribing your intended subject with flattery, use subtle phrasing and off-the-cuff remarks to flatter your recipient.

For example, instead of telling your boss, "Hey, that's a really nice tie, do you think I could take an extra hour for lunch today? I know you're usually flexible, but I wanted to run it past you to be sure.